XL Sweatpants

I wish you could see the garden. It is a huge, weedy mess and I cannot weed yet because I have a broken finger on one hand and a sprained wrist on the other. Man...

Don't tell but I am considering hiring someone to come and weed it...for pay. Doesn't that make you laugh? I have to admit, no matter how hard I try to make things run smoothly...Bam! There were so many things I wanted to get done this summer- not including driving a riding lawnmower off of a four foot wall. I guess life happens sometimes.

This week has been fairly quiet. The boys were up at Michigan State University for three days. That made for a quiet house. Then Jacie went visiting and I was BY MYSELF. Yes, I am yelling that at you. I am so rarely by myself. Guess what I did with my free time...?

Yup. Slept. It was wonderful. I love sleep.

I missed the kids though. I find that they keep me occupied on so many levels that it is too quiet, too lazy when they are not here.

The boys came home today and are grouchy, grouchy, grouchy...

I have been hiding from Loren. He is biting everyone's head off and saying, "How come none of you are nice to me?"

I laugh behind his back. I would never do it in front of him because he would probably 'eat me for supper...' He is the responsible one. He spent his entire time away taking care of all of his brother's cares. He sees the problems and jumps in to fix them before Jared has even realized that a problem could exist. It is a tremendous burden for him to carry. I am thinking of ways to help him relax and have fun. He is so funny and fun to be around when he isn't tired, hot, worried, stressed, hungry, alone or with people. We call him our Little Old Man...

On the other front, Jared is our carefree guy. He rarely worries about things. I sent each boy with the same amount of money. Bart and I talked about how he would come home with nothing. We were right. He spent every cent. The portion that wasn't spent- he used in the vending machine of the dorm before they left. Too funny. If it tells you anything about the difference between these boys, Loren spent $8. total- Jared...? Times that by 6. Having said that, Jared brought me a lovely gift- A pair of XL sweatpants...

I am working on how to cut them down three sizes without ruining them. The funny thing is that he called and asked what size I wore. I said, "Well it depends..."

He replied, "For pajamas?"

I said, "Go Big. I love comfortable PJs."

He definitely went big...

Bart and I worry about 'losing' our boys. There are so many things that could go wrong in their relationship with us, each other and the cute little Chinese child that we thrust into their lives. I am watching our boys grow into young men and am grateful for the gift I have of being home with them. There are times that I would like to invest in permanent, thick ear plugs to drown out the bickering but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I am enjoying the summer in the garden- even if it hasn't worked out exactly as planned.

~Camo Pants

A Little Change in Plans

What was I thinking?!?

I planned a peaceful, quiet summer in the garden surrounded by loving children and the beauty of nature. Why would I do that when my reality is SO far from the serenity I desired. I planned this little project when the temperatures were in the 60s, the children were just completing school and the house was on schedule. Not two weeks into my little experiment- Bam!

It is over. The children are bickering, the garden is shriveling from the heat, the house is pushed back again and we are going on vacation to attend my brother's wedding. When did I think I would fit in gardening? Peacefulness? Quiet?

So I have changed my agenda. Instead of focusing my time on the time in the garden, I am going to [hopefully] grab the moments in between the crazy and really hold onto them. I am going to find the good in the midst of the crazy and settle my mind on it. When you see me, you might see a nutsy woman running behind 3 children, 6 pigs, 7 goats, 25 chickens, 2 rabbits, 3 dogs and 2 horses but that will be just an illusion. Though I will be doing all of those things- my true self will be focused on the night before when I had a special moment with one of the kids or the early morning snuggle that occurred with the youngest. So the summer in the garden will still be occurring- just in my heart.

I had one of those moments today. Loren and I drove the horses back to stable and enjoyed a nice talk. He is very interesting. He studies what he likes so intently and becomes a walking encyclopedia about various topics. It is hard to believe that he is thirteen. He looks about fifteen and talks about twenty~

It is truly amazing how quickly he has grown. He tries to be mature and handle himself correctly and I give him credit for that.

Jared, on the other hand, has entered the slippery slope of growing up. He is learning to curb his tongue to match what is expected. He too is interested in a lot of topics and enjoys playing the drums. I have yet to find a moment to connect with him because of his emotional state. Wow...

Jacie and I continue to morph into what I would consider a normal relationship. We have more moments together. She is my little lady. She is trying to steal my husband but other than that- she's a keeper.

My life is crazy. It is hectic. It is sometimes difficult. Yet, it is mine and for that I am grateful.
Hope that all is well for you-

~Camo Pants